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Writer's pictureWee Hen Tang

The Law of Reflection/Mirroring 镜像定律




I remembered the song sung during the Mirroring Workshop by Dehyana: there is only one of us, in your eyes, it’s me  I see….”.

记得6-7 年前, 在 Dehyana镜像课程中唱着“ 这里只有一个我,在你眼里, 我看到自己”。很多时后, 我们都很容易的把手指指向外面, “这都是你的错,你伤害我,。。。。”你是受害者, 你生气, 不服气, 你感到很讨厌,你开始有了报复的念头。在镜像定律里, 那个错,指责, 生气, 讨厌, 老早已存在你内心里, 那个人只是把它们通通反射出来好让你有·那经验来帮助你心灵成长。也根据奇迹课程其中 一个的原则, 请你收回手指,把手指向里边指吧! 述短来说,从心灵成长的角度, 我们还要 感恩那些激起我们的愤怒, 憎恨 的人, 事情/ 东西。

在人生/人际关系教练过程中, 教练会使用“反射”作为其中一个工具来 让被叫练者自我评估自己的想法、感觉、行为和行动,反映所期望的结果 及需要改进的地方。

in Coaching, reflection is one of the tools to help coach to assess their thinking, feeling, behaviour and actions, evaluate the effectiveness & areas for improvement


I find that this article is easy to understand about the concept of Reflection & Mirroring written by BeVerly Blanchard.  Enjoy!!!

The Law of Reflection deals with the fact that everything you see is only a mirror reflection of that which is within you.  This is one of the hardest laws for people to understand and accept because we like to think that it is outside people or circumstances that are causing us to be happy or angry.  Since everything is vibration it is you who is attracting these external situations to you.  Hence, that individual who irritates you has come into your life because that is an active vibration within you.  That irritable person is mirroring that which exists within you.

Under the Law of Reflection you cannot place the blame on any external person, situation or circumstance.  You simply cannot say that someone makes you angry or irritated if you are not already angry and irritated within yourself.  It is not the other person who is making you angry.  It is you who is making yourself angry and majority of the time it is because you are trying to change, control or manipulate a person or situation.  In reality, you cannot change the outer until you deal with the inner.

When working with the Law of Reflection, it is important to understand that sometimes the mirror may not be a direct reflection of what is within you.  It may be a reflection of your polar opposite.  Such is the case where you are overly kind and through your kindness, you are continually attract people and situations that take advantage of your kindness.  You may be attracting these people into your life so that you can see where your kindness is being motivated by your own guilt or the need to get people to like you.  Being kind in all situations and circumstances is not always an honorable trait for sometimes we are forgetting to value and appreciate ourselves.

Another analogy can be seen if you are upset with people begging for money on street corners.  You may be angry because these individuals are representing some part of yourself that is begging for something in your life.  You may be begging for recognition from your boss.  Perhaps, you are begging for love from your spouse.  As a politician, you may be begging for votes from the electorate.

Everyone and every circumstance or situation in your life is providing you with the opportunity to learn something about yourself.  It may be a reflection showing some of your more positive traits or it may be showing you where you need to make some changes.  If it is showing you a negative quality, you will know you have balanced that trait when you no longer have any irritations with regards to the person or situation.  Sometimes when this happens the person will disappear from your life.  They will no longer be a vibrational match to you.

So, next time you find you are angry or irritated with someone or a circumstance stop and ask yourself:  What state of being is this person reflecting about me?  Where in my own life am I exhibiting this behavior?  What is it that I do not want to reveal about myself to myself?

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